“success is lik…

“success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it”
Maya Angelou

At 12 years old I had a lot going on, a young girl trying to figure out why the world seemed so cruel, my English teacher Mr. Morgan read a quote once which made me picked up a poetry book and I started to write poetry and learned to express my feelings with poetry and it’s stuck with me ever since.

RIP Dr Maya Angelou you were smart, intelligent, beautiful and inspired me to be me even when being me wasn’t cool.

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Oh Memories of  memories past… stories told with out meaning…breathes taken yet no life

there she goes again mouth wide open lips moving yet she speaks no words…how badly she wants to be heard but all they see is lips moving…knowing her name and nothing else….lips like mine moving…eyes slanted yet wide enough to see, yet she goes unseen un heard…ears shaped like a perfect C with an in shaped rose petal…hidden behind her hair….she hears you even though you ignore her…you notice her scent cause its a soft scent…its welcoming but yet you walk away….laying on the floor lifeless you recognise her for the first time…SHE IS BEAUTIFUL…you remember how soft spoken she was and how you used to love her then you wake up and she is there smiling and suddenly you see her, hear her love her and appreciate her….ITS NOT TOO LATE

Trying times

them days them days

turn weeks

turn months

a year maybe

now you cant remember how life was with out them days

cool breeze blowing as I sit on the front porch

fenced backyard.

5bedrooms 3bathrooms 2living-rooms 1hot-tub a huge kitchen

that full bar in the basement and more

time to down size the economy got me changing lifestyles 😦

I always wanted to move

never felt like this was quite mine

but

a two bedroom wasn’t quite what I had in mind

this is not the neighborhood I had in mind

but then I am home

I am happy

I see you and a smile brights up my day

I suddenly remember how Rich I am

because I have you

I have your love 🙂

and just like that I found

JOY

PEACE

and even this home looks just GRAND


i am going to miss you the most hot tub

I’M GOING TO MISS YOU THE MOST JACUZZI 🙂

SEED

emotions

they are so unpredictable

gifts can be disguises of pain

waking up to those two lines wow

could it be

no lets take two more oh I see two lines

3more times I still see two lines

lets go Digital

I am!!!

Oh my anxious tummy ache

Oh wow it is

its life

oh worry this is the wrong time, no not now,

acceptance

oh yes thank goodness

its perfect its amazing it is life

Wondering what could it be

a football player or a ballerina

oh the possible names

the lady in the white suit

somethings wrong

worry! fear!! dissappointment!!!

and just like that

Life dissapears!!!!

😦

Oh month of June

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pictures from Google.

7 days to her 14th birthday

She said good bye to her much younger cousin, and happily went to see her older cousin, along with another cousin who was a few years younger than her, over joyed in her innocence, she had been through so much in her life, and just excited that things finally seemed normal, and she was indeed content with NORMAL.

At her 17 year old cousins house all the parents where gone for the night to a party and they where ready to have a good time. so her cousin called a friend, who decided they should get drinks, but they were all too young to buy it, so her cousin called her twenty year old boyfriend, who came with two of his friends who were over 21.

The three men got there, already drunk with out any drinks, so they decided every one will walk to the store, and pick out what they wanted. but the young girl 7days to her 14th birthday decided to stay behind, and her cousins 20year old boyfriend decided to stay behind also.

Everyone was gone, and she was left home alone with him!

He asked her for some water, the young NAIVE girl walked to the kitchen, opened up the fridge, pulled out a bottle of water, as she closed the door, he was standing there over her blocking her exit from the kitchen, she handed him a bottle of water.

But the water wasn’t what he wanted.

She noticed he had a remote in his hand, then she said again clearing her throat “Here is your water” he grabbed her and whispered in her ears “we can do this, the easy way or we can do it the hard way”

“please can you move out my way” she said

He turned up the radio with the remote he had in his hand, and grabbed her pressing his lips against hers…

pushing him away from her, she smelled the alcohol on him, he grabbed her again saying “I guess you chose the hard way”

pushing her to the floor and ripping her pants off, she screamed get off! his reply no one can hear you.

looking at the time it was 2 mins passed the hour, he pulled his pants down and releasing the worm, forcing himself on her, but he was having difficulties planting his worm in the untouched ocean…

as the scared young lady is learning what SEX is for the very first time.

18mins after the hour she continued begging him to stop, asking if she can do something else to make him stop…..

20mins after the hour he decided he wanted to break her innocence, because the other thing wasn’t what he wanted.

crying, screaming and begging…

he continued to deflower her.

1 min after the next hour everyone was back, and already drunk, the young girl on the couch in the dark curled up in tears, and the 20year old guy laid out on the couch.

Her 17year old cousin too drunk to notice anything takes her 20year old boyfriend upstairs, and gives him some of her chocolate chip cookies.

20mins later every one is gone, and the lights are on

for the first time since her older cousin got back, she noticed her on the couch, eyes red and in tears….

your BOYFRIEND RAPED ME FOR 59mins!

her cousin scared of getting in trouble for having boys over.

says lay on the floor, spread your legs let me check you.

seeing blood roll down her little cousins thigh she says “you wanted this, and if you say anything I will say you wanted it, now go take a shower I will deal with him myself!”

I did not want that! I did not want that, I did not ask for it she said as tears rolled down her cheek, walking up the stairs in pain to go wash him off.

7days to her 14th Birthday.

My First Blog Ever-Intro

Today Was a good day, I went to school and got to hear different presentations, but there was one that stood out the most it was by a man named M. he spoke in my Marketing class, and talked about blogs being a positive way of practicing to write better. I have told you why I decided to open my blog, now let me tell you who I am, I am a daughter who has grown into a woman and is still growing everyday but to you I am Cindy or Precious 🙂 PreciouslymeCindy works as well. I am a woman finding herself and finding the world too. I have been through so Much in the 26years that I have been alive and its made me who I am today…… there is so much To tell but why write a book on my first blog……My blogs are going to be about life and that consists of everything, movies, food, poetry, love etc happy reading…..,